Real Talk.

Real Talk.

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

I've been thinking about this post for a couple of days. Most of my posts are upbeat, but this one is more real talk. 

Last week I moved to a new city to attend graduate school.  I have known since April that this was going to happen, but to say that I was unprepared would be an understatement. I don't know if I have ever been as anxious as I have been the last few weeks; I haven't been able to sleep, my appetite has been non-existent, and my stomach has been in knots. For the most part I just ignored my apprehension instead of dealing with it. On Sunday when I parted ways with my mother and sister I was an absolute wreck. I held back tears as I took I-95 north to my new home. 

The next few days seemed to drag by and my apprehension/homesickness reached a new level. Sunday night was terrible as I let the tears slide down my cheeks while I overthought orientation the next morning and my overwhelming desire to be at my parents' home. At one point I seriously considered re-packing my car and speeding home, but deep down I knew that wasn't an option. Although I was (am) feeling completely overwhelmed by the new city, new people (I've met some amazing people in my program!), new school and all the emotions that go along with such a huge change, I also know that I am where I am supposed to be. There are incredible opportunities ahead. I know that these fears and anxieties are not going to fade overnight, but I've found some things to help stunt them in the interim:

Church
One thing I love about the Church is the immediate network and group of friends. There are several other people in my same situation which led to immediate bonding and friendship.

Parents
I have called my parents pretty much every day since I moved and am not the least bit ashamed. My parents are my best friends and are the one people who won't judge you for crying or being completely irrational. It's a beautiful thing.

Netflix
I believe there are times in life when it is appropriate to binge watch Netflix. Being in a completely new situation/city/life is one of those times. A familiar movie or show gives a weird sense of normalcy. However, if you have opportunities to go out with new friends, etc. Netflix becomes unacceptable.

Workout
As Elle Woods taught us, "Exercise gives you endorphins; endorphins make you happy." I still haven't found the campus gym, but doing a short workout from Pinterest has done wonders for me.

Long Showers
I think a long, hot shower is the remedy for every wrong in this world. Soaking in the warm water relaxes both my mind and body. So much anxiety wears me out, but a nice steam helps put me at ease and get to sleep usually.